Unforgiving Love Bella & Edward
by atragicstory
Summary: Bella Swan lays her eyes on the mysterious Edward while wandering in the woods. There is strong spark that neither of them can ignore. But Bella has a dark past. An unforgiving tense love story with the ultimate twist. Just leave it all to fate.
1. Chapter 1 Unexpected

**Bella**

I stood frozen in an emotion that I could not understand nor comprehend. I was struggling to breathe, dragging each gasp of air out of my lungs. The natural instinct would be to run. Run away. Yet I wanted nothing more to take a step forward. Towards him. I watched him move; silently and eloquently through the trees. His dark eye's had not left mine since the minute I had seen him appear from the shrub.

Ripping my arms from their limp place beside my shivering body, I placed my palms up in a sign that I hope would show no danger. Tears brimmed at my eyes but I blinked forcing them to stay hidden. He disappeared for what could have only been a second only to appear an arm's length distance away from me. He continued to hold my gaze, even as I felt the heat race up my neck to leave to distinct blush on my pale skin. He took another hesitant step towards me, leaving only centimetres of space between our bodies. I noticed the dark coal black of his eyes, a clear sign of danger yet I felt no desire to run. The purple shading below his eyes, contrasted against his smooth pale skin. Every part of him screamed danger. Yet the emotion deep within his eyes told me not to run. A deep growl erupted deep within his throat, sending electric shocks down my spine and sending the hot tears spilling over onto my ice cold cheeks. He moved.

**Edward**

I did not understand. A hundred years of life had not given me an experience even close to this. This girl, innocent, beautiful and calm was standing motionless before me. The fire tore through my throat, begging for its fix. The fiery venom filled my mouth. But it was the more potent emotion that I could not understand that stopped me from slipping into my natural crouch. An emotion that made no sense. I was a monster, without a soul or a chance at redemption. Stalking silently through the damp scrub, I could not break her hypnotising gaze. A single sound had not escaped from her pink lips, nor had she even tried to run. I did not understand.

Slowly she lifted her hands palms towards me, like she was trying to portray to me that there was no danger. She thought that I envisaged her as danger? I ran towards her, stopping head half a meter from her shaking body. She did not drop her gaze. Her brown eyes deep with curiosity. Her lips opened only millimetres as she blew a sweet scent lightly across my face. A growl ripped from my throat before I even had to chance to prevent it. Her expression flickered, a reaction to my growl. Grinding my teeth against each other, trying to rid the venom from my mouth I saw the crystal tears trickle down her the cheek. So I did the unthinkable.

**Bella**

His ice cold lips crushed against mine, with an uncontrollable passion. His fingers pressed against either side of my head, stopping me from breaking his grasp. Not that I indented to. I wound my arms around neck as his arms slipped around my waist to pull me against his body. A pulled back only slightly to take a breath, and focus my eyes on his still black iris's. His face was bright yet his lips were pulled into a tight line and his eyes unfocused. He did not take a step away from me nor did he drop his stone embrace. What was he? Or Who was he? Very slowly he dropped his head to press his lips against mine with the lightest of pressure. Before pulling back to smile at me with a expression that made my head spin.

"Bella…"

I closed my eyes to steady myself and to string a comprehendible sentence together. His lips pressed lightly to my forehead. Heat rushed through my body, a strange yet very enjoyable feeling. Opening my eyes, I opened my mouth to speak but I couldn't. He was gone.


	2. Chapter 2 I dont know you

**Bella**

Curling up on the wooden stairs of the porch I hugged my knees tighter to my chest. I could not get him out of my thoughts. My favourite book lay open beside but I couldn't concentrate for any longer than 30seconds before my attention wandered to his cold touch. Shivers run down my spine as I thought of the spontaneous and fervent kiss we had shared earlier this morning. I didn't even know his name, yet he knew mine He had said it with this reverence, something I couldn't understand. I had never set my eyes on him before, yet I wanted nothing to be held in his arms once more; to feel his icy fingertips lingering as they danced over my body. Shaking my head, I closed my eyes hoping to create his perfect face in my mind. It was not every part of him that kept replaying in my mind, just the little quirks that appealed to me. The tilt of his head before he laid his lips so possessively on mine, like he honestly wanted nothing else in this world. The deep black of his eyes, trying to speak to me without the need of words. His hard arms holding my shaking body so naturally against him. I heard a whisper of wind, too loud to be an actual person, so I kept my eyes closed to stay in my happy place. With the slightest pressure I felt someone press their lips to my forehead and the flutter of paper dropped onto my open book. Snapping my eyes open, I saw nothing but my bland and empty front yard. There wasn't even a car parked in the street. Reaching down to pick up the paper, I did not recognise the elegant script that made my own handwriting look like a disgrace.

Bella,

I did the unspeakable this morning. I haven't been fair to you or my family. Yesterday I didn't understand the meaning of life; nothing held me here except the fear of hurting my family. I don't want to hurt you Bella, but you mean everything to me. I don't want to go. I don't know what the right thing to do; morally or ethically. But I do want you, and I don't know whyt.

Edward

"Breathe Bella"

Wrenching my eyes from the note I held hopefully between my fingers, I saw him. Obeying his words, I let a slow breath escape my lungs. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, a cute smile stretched across his glowing face.

"mmkay" I closed my eyes, and counted aloud to ten only to open my eyes to see him standing exactly where he had been with his head tilted to the side slightly watching me with amusement.

"Great now I just look stupid" I mumbled as I dropped my head to stare at his words once again. He couldn't be real. I was just an ordinary girl who had never had a boyfriend in the entire 17years she had lived.

**Edward**

So warm. So innocent. So beautiful. Who was I to corrupt and destroy her? I was a monster not God. Yet I wrote her that letter, a sign of forgiveness for what I did this morning. Her brown eyes danced as she read my letter. I was a coward, I should have had the courage to face her beauty and…

I walked towards her and stopped at the bottom of the porch stairs. I could smell the warm sweet sense of her blood pulsing just below the creamy white surface of her skin. Struggling to hold up at least part of my human charade, I scraped my hand through my hair. The burning venom ripped through my mouth, my throat tore in two pieces raging for only one thing. Concentrating hard on her face, I searched but heard nothing. No voice. No breath.

"Breathe Bella" I whispered trying so hard not to scare her. Clenching my fists at my side to stop myself from reaching out to her. Right that second there was nothing that I wanted more than to hold her. The venom had disappeared, leaving me to feel fresh and optimistic. Was that even possible? Control was essential for our family to live within a town just like Forks. Did I have enough control to not hurt her?

**Bella**

"Bella… It's not right for me…" I cut him off, needing to get something very important off my chest. "Edward?" Saying his name as a question rather than an introduction to what was going to be an incredibly long sentence "I don't know who you are, I don't know what you are…" Anger, shock and despair flashed across his face simultaneously "But I have_ never_ felt like I did this morning… and quite frankly it felt amazing…" I dropped my eyes from his deep golden stare, his gaze only made my words come out jumbled and incoherent "…and I'd like to feel like that again" By the time I had finished the simple yet incredibly forthcoming sentence my voice was no more than a whisper. I waited. Waited for a sound. Movement. A sign to tell me that I hadn't put my heart out there for nothing. The silence continued for a lifetime. Scared that he would have disappeared when I lifted my head, I risked a quick glance to the bottom of the stairs to see his shoes still there. My heart raced faster still knowing he was still only a meter away, in pure flesh and blood.

"Bella..." He groaned.

The disappointment laced through his voice made me curl over my knees even more. He didn't feel the same. I was sooo stupid to think that he WOULD. No one ever feels the fucking same. That's my problem. Dropping my head to rest of my knees, I felt the tears spill over for the second time today.

"Figures…"Rejection had never hurt this much. It was usually just another confirmation that I wasn't good enough. That I never would be. But the rejection from his silence rushed over me like a tidal wave, strong an unexplained.

"No Bella… Don't…" His strained voice broke up, causing me to instinctively look at him. "..cry."Maybe it was his plan all along. "YOU don't understand. YOU have no idea. I want NOTHING more right now than to rip your clothes off, push you against that wall" He motioned the wall next to the front door "and have EVERY part of you. Right now." He breathed in and out slowly with a strained control. A slow smile slipped across his face. "But that would be impolite".

As much as I tried to hold it back, a sheepish grin spread across my face. Standing up, I stretched feeling my shirt ride up over my belly button and Edward's eyes flicker to my bare skin. I stumbled down the three stairs to fall into his arms. His icy fingertips brushed the tears still lingering on my sticky cheeks. I reached on my tippy toes to kiss his cheek slowly, feeling blood rise below the surface of my skin.

"I don't even know you" Whispering into his soft cotton shirt, which smelt amazingly nice.

"Yet"


	3. Chapter 3 A Storm

**Summary: **Bella Swan lays her eyes on the mysterious and beautiful Edward while wandering in the woods. There is strong connection that neither of them can ignore. An unforgiving tense love story with the ultimate twist. What is Bella's fate?

**Author Note: **I'm a little unsure on this chapter. It needs to happen but it's a little slow at the beginning. KEEP READING, it does get better. Leave your review either negative or positive. Comments drive me to write more. This chapter may be tweaked later, depending on responses.

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**Bella**

The sun was sneaking through the partially closed blinds. I pulled the sheets tighter against my body, refusing to admit that it was morning and I did have to get my backside out of bed. I could hear Charlie, my dearest father bustling around in the kitchen, no doubt trying to fix himself breakfast. Frowning, I tried to remember what day it was… Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday… SATURDAY! NO SCHOOL. Throwing the covers back in newly found enthusiasm, I jumped out of bed and checked the calendar hanging on the wall of the bathroom. It was Saturday, and I had a whole day ahead of me. Hearing Charlie curse at the toaster, I sighed and wandered down the stairs; knowing the sooner I got him sorted meant less cleaning up the kitchen after.

Seeing me enter the kitchen, Charlie's face lit up in excitement, "Bells I think it's time to buy a new toaster, because this one keeps spitting out coal black toast..." He continued ranting about the toaster but I heard nothing. Coal black. The colour of his eyes. "…do you want me to get one or are you okay to go visit the store?" I wondered silently what he might be doing today "Bells?" Shivers danced down my spine as I remember the cool touch of his lips against the embarrassing heat of my face. "Bella?"  
Maybe Forks wasn't going to be half bad. A little distraction wasn't going to hurt.

"ISABELLA? IF YOU DON'T..." Oh crap. Charlie. "Huh? Oh the toaster? What's the dial on?" I finally noticed he had spent the last 3minutes trying to talk to me and I hadn't noticed a word he'd said. His face was still red from the anger. Someone had rolled out of bed on the wrong side this morning. He fumbled with the side of the toaster "Umm 6? The highest one? Doesn't that make it cook quicker?" Laughter spilled out of my body at his words. How had this man survived for the past 17years before I had moved the town of green, Forks? Laughing had only put him in a worse mood. "I don't think it's very funny Bella, I have a meeting with the Head Police Captain from Seattle at 9.30 and I'm hungry" Struggling to keep the laughter stilled inside me until he was at least out of the room, I walked towards the toaster and spun the dial towards 2 and chucked in another piece of bread. He watched me in silence as I watched the toast grow golden before popping out the top. Placing it on the plate I set it in front of him. "No putting to dial on 6 is going to give you black hard rock's for toast. Try leaving it on two from now on, yeah?" He mumbled thanks before sitting down at the table to spread peanut butter over his toast. There has been some kidnapping's in Forks lately, little kids disappearing at parks and swimming pools. Charlie, being the police chief in Forks was in charge of investigating and so far he had come up empty. Dumping his plate in the sink he turned to me, the anger had vanished from his features. "I've got to go otherwise I'll be late, my phone will be off today but leave me a message if you're planning on going out. Bye Bells" The anger had been replaced with stress and anxiousness that now played across his eyes. He never before made me tell him to report my whereabouts daily. "Good luck Dad. Will do. I think I'll catch up on the washing and homework" stepping forward to give him a quick hug before he headed towards the door.

Deciding to take a quick shower and get dressed I headed back up the stairs, noticing the sky had grown extremely dark in the past 10minutes. Jumping into the shower, I let the hot streams of water run over my back slowly working out the knots from my restless night's sleep. My dreams had been harsh, colourful and sharp, not the usual easy flow of my fantasies. They refused to make sense either, short flashes of scenes that neither connected nor related to my activities or thoughts that day.

Turning the water off I stepped awkwardly out of the shower, slipping my soft towel around my body and securing it under my arm. I walked to the bathroom mirror and let the towel fall to the ground. I studied my body with scrutiny. The almost non-existent curve of my shoulder blades, and my hips. The dull albino complexion of my skin, against the again boring brown of my eyes. I didn't make sense. He was beautiful. There was no other way to explain it. Yet for the first time a guy that didn't wear coke bottle glasses and wasn't more interested in video games than girls actually showed interest in me. Harsh but true. Sure, those guys were nice but it honestly felt wrong not matter how much I tried to talk myself into it. Slipping my boy leg underwear on and a simple black bra, I again studied my body in the foggy mirror. If he was really after just one thing, I'm pretty sure Jessica Stanley would be more than happy to put out. But he had never made that move on me. Wasn't I worth it? Shaking my head, I remembered the way his finger tips danced over my body, smiling in the distant pleasure. Stepping into my jeans, I buttoned them up slowly. Glancing at the window as a static flash of lightning blazed across the sky. I loved storms. Reaching for my shirt, draped across the basin, a horrendous crack of thunder bellowed from the sky. Jumping in shock I smashed my head on the cabinet above the sink. The thud of the wood against my skull echoed through my head, sending sharp shooting pains down my spine. Dizzy and trembling in pain, my knees collapsed from beneath as I made the slow descent to the tiled floor. In the distant I heard the crack as my shoulder followed by my head hit the tiles. Struggling to hold onto consciousness, I tried to think of any distinct train of thought… Edward… in the forest… standing 30 feet away… coal black eyes. The darkness surrounding me got closer and closer. Dark tendrils crept in from the edges of my fuzzy vision, until I could see nothing but faint slices of light and it pushed me under into the sea of darkness.

**Edward**

Pacing across her front lawn I wondered what she was doing. Her pretty… no gorgeous face lit by her bright smile. I could almost hear the beat of my heart, even though it was nonexistent. The sky had grown immensely dark over the past half hour. Alice had not said that it was going to rain today; then again she hadn't spoken to him since our fight last night. The house was so tense right now. Jasper didn't know who to work on first. The distinct sound of tire screeching away from our house last night still played over and over in my head. I was tearing my family apart again. I looked up as I heard someone, I assumed Bella, turn on the shower. Her stunning body unprotected and bare no more than 30feet away. I felt the heat rise from my feet, spreading around my body. Looking down again, stunned at the reaction of my own body. "What the hell?" Muttering to myself. I walked to the front door, knocking before I realised there was no one around to answer it. Gently turning the handle, surprised to find it unlocked. Wandering into the kitchen, I saw three pieces of what looked to be toast but were cold and burnt black. Stifling a laugh, I headed towards the staircase softly walking towards the sound of water. What was I doing? I barely knew her. Yet I was walking around her house uninvited while she showered. How would she react if she found me? As I stopped outside the bathroom door I heard the shower shut off. Slowly, I placed my forehead against the door. Breathing in her sweet scent that lingered in the air. Slowly I breathed out; clenching my jaw as the burning venom once again filled my mouth. An unexpected crash of thunder cracked above the house, shaking it in the slightest way. Hearing another thud, followed by a soft whimper. Bella. Clenching my fists beside my body, I reached one hand out to the handle trying to jimmy the lock without leaving behind an unexplained crumbled lock. "Bella?" I called out… hoping with everything I had that she was okay. Hearing another crack as bone hit the tiled floor, nothing was more important than getting to her. Aiming my shoulder into the door, I shoved a small amount of body weight into the door. It splintered underneath my touch. Pushing past it I swung the door open to see my worst nightmares lying right in front of me. The venom in my mouth pulsed as the burning inferno tore through my throat once again. Dashing to her side, I held my breath but this time I couldn't control it. Instinctively my lip curled over my teeth. Ready. No No NO! I fought against everything that I am, but I wasn't winning. A growl escaped from the back of my throat as I gently shook her shoulders. She stirred slightly, her eyelids flickering. My eyes black with thirst glared at her. My body had a mind of its own and right this moment it wanted nothing but blood. A stream of blood ran down her face and pulled beside her head. Pulling back my hands I placed them on either side of my head…trying to control the thirst. Bella's eyes opened cloudy with pain, she stared into my eyes taking a few seconds to recognise me. Without thinking I let a breath escape me, as the scent of her blood sent my flying backwards against the wall. Pinning myself against the wall, I tried to remember what Carlisle had told me "Look into their eyes, and think of them as a person. As a person, Edward". I saw his bright face in my mind but this time it gave me little hope.

"Edward?" Bella mumbled beneath her breath, yet her pain still laced each word. "Help me" She breathed, her scent begging me to come closer. Crawling back to her trembling body, I looked into her eyes, praying to a God that I never before believed existed for control. The venom pulsed in my body, filling my mouth with the burning sensation. "Edward…"Tears spilled over her cheeks, mixing with the blood creating a more potent mix. I. could. Not. Control. It. A growl ripped from the back of my throat. Dropping her hand, I ran.


	4. Chapter 4 Monster

**Edward**

Throwing myself on the moss covered ground, I breathed in the strong earthy scent of the groundcover. Relaxing instantly, I felt the fire simmer down to its usual heat along my throat. I could smell nothing but the soil pressed against my face, although I could still hear her erratic heartbeat only a breath away. So close yet unreachable.

All my 90years of… well life I had known one simple fact. I was a monster. The worse kind. I am the world's most dangerous predator. A monster that didn't deserve life, and every day that I saw innocent people die it pushed that fact in my face harder and harder. But today I proved myself wrong. I ran away from someone that needed help. Someone that needed MY help. Someone that wanted me. Someone that I cared about. And I denied them of that.

Dragging myself into a sitting position, I watched and I waited. For someone to fix it. Someone that had the strength and control I didn't. I couldn't leave. I would never forgive myself if I moved any further than the misty air of the forest. Close enough to hear her heart beat and each sharp intake of air yet too far away to do any good.

**Bella **

Blinking, I opened my eyes to see the odd shade of blue Charlie had painted the ceiling. I wasn't sure it even had a name. Then it hit. It felt like someone had knocked me out using a bowling ball. The pounding make thinking difficult. Something trickled down my neck… water... definitely water since it looked like I was in a bathroom. I had no idea what had happened. Where the hell I was? Why was I stark naked or why I had this vivid dream that Edward had been in this bathroom sometime earlier. Pulling myself up onto my elbows I felt the blood rush from my head and the dizziness incapitate my body. Shivering as a lied back down on the ice cold floor, I tried to remember. Nothing. Zip. Zero. Zilch. Except Edward. But I knew that could very much be a product of my imagination rather than a memory. Closing my eyes, I wondered if I would be found.

I heard feather footsteps coming up the stairs. Charlie had said he would be out all day, but I couldn't remember extensive periods of time.

"Bella..?" A soft females voice called out from somewhere on the other side of the wall.

"In the bathroom" but it came out as a slither of air. There is no way she could have heard me. But out of nowhere Alice, my only friend since coming to Forks, appeared next to me.

"OMG… I only saw glimpses.. OMG I would have come… What hurts Bella?... hey I where's Edw…" Her sweet voice stop dead mid sentence as her finger touched the blood running down my forehead. Her eyes darkened and her hand began to shake. Closing her eyes, she looked like she was concentrating on something very hard.

"Alice….? Are you okay? What were you saying about Edward?" Struggling I forced myself into a sitting position, wincing at every moment. She opened her eyes and smiled, way too forcefully to look natural. Reaching into her pocket she grabbed her mobile and began talking extremely fast. Or maybe it just felt like that because I was feeling light headed.

"Bella, can you move? I'm going to take you to the hospital okay? You've got some pretty serious injuries" Gently she slipped her arm around my waist, and pulled me to my feet and walked me to the black Mercedes sitting in my drive way.

"Alice… What did you say about Edward? Do you know him? She just looked at me with that look she got when she was worried and guided me down the stairs.

**Edward**

"ALICE" I roared jumping to my feet as I watched her dance across Bella's front lawn arm firmly around her shaking waist and press her into the passenger's seat. Darting around to the other side of the car, she was chanting a random nursery rhyme. Trying to keep me out.

"Alice… I heard you say Edward before? What did you mean by where is he?" The tone of Bella's voice stung as she struggled to understand. She was pale, as well me, I winced at the dried blood on her face and splattered across her shirt. Monster.

"Bella… It's kind of complicated and I cant… wont answer for my brothers choices"

"YOUR BROTHER?" I saw the incredulous look that shot across her face at the word brother.

"Yes my brother. He hasn't lived with us for a while… he was on exchange. He isn't my biological brother Bella, Carlisle, who you have met, is my… well our... adopted Father" She was struggling to piece together a believable story, that wouldn't incriminate either of us later.

"I won't lie to her Edward" Her tone suggested it wasn't a threat. No, it was blunt honesty.

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**Sorry this took so long to write. It has taken me ages to piece together how this is going to work. Its been sitting on my computer half finished for a while. Im on holidays as well now for 5 weeks and Im hoping to finish this story before school goes back in Feb. **

**Reviews are VERY much loved. They encourage me to write, and sort of like confirm that im on the right track with my story. I cant say I have a lot of confidence in what Im writing but I DO enjoy it, and I hope you do too! So leave a review with your thoughts.**

**Also, since you guys would have an interest in Twilight, go visit my fansite ****. A new layout just went up and there are some big changes and additions coming in the near future!**


	5. Chapter 5 Answers

**Author Notes: **

**This chapter and the next one will explain a lot of things. I have left a lot of open clues. They will be longer than usual because I need to get a lot in before I can continue on. Another thing is that Bella and Edward are slightly OOC. Not majorly. They are still our Bella and Edward. Its just some of their decisions will be different, than in the series and it is AU.**

**I had trouble deciding where to cut this, and since I wanted to update now I cut the chapter after BPOV. I have half the next chapter written, so it should be coming tomorrow.**

**Thank you soo much for the alerts, its really encouraging to check my email and see all the alerts. The reviews have been… few and far between… but extra thanks to those have reviewed. It is very much appreciated.**

**Bella**

Opening my eyes, I found myself staring at the ceiling. Again. Now what the HELL was with Forks and their funky coloured ceilings? Unless Charlie had somehow been assigned to painting the ceilings in every building…

Dizziness rippled down my body as I tried to lift my head from the pillow. The pounding that I could only vaguely remember had been masked, by a hard shot of morphine. My forehead felt strangely tight, like someone had tried to stretch my skin tighter over my skull. Shuddering at that slightly gruesome thought, I reached my hand up to touch the gauze plastered to my face.

"Well don't you look stunning" A musical voice called from the door. Dr Carlisle's face appeared seconds later above mine. Seconds later, Alice's bright face appeared on his shoulder, winking mischievously at me.

"Morning sunshine" She laughed sweetly as she winked at me again.

"Alice, I can't treat her with you hanging off me like a monkey. Where is Jasper?" Carlisle mentioned playfully. Jasper was Alice's old and dangerous boyfriend, whom I had never met. Something I was glad of. I had spent many hours being pulled around shopping centres looking for the latest fashions; I cringed at the thought of spending time with her and her boyfriend. The word obsessive came to mind. Ugh.

"Alice tells me you took a nice spill in your bathroom yesterday. Can you tell me what hurts the most?" His eyes watched my expression as his fingers gently prodded my forehead.

"Everything" I breathed slowly as the pain grew under his gentle fingertips. He pulled his hands away to flick through the mound of paper work stuck on my clipboard. "But mostly my head" I offered, trying to be helpful. He moved to the foot of the bed to angle my bed to a more upright position.

"Bella, you have a fairly serious concussion which explains the pain, as well as 7stictches to close the laceration to your forehead. You'll need to stay with us for another day or so to confirm there are no more serious injuries. I'll be back later to check on you" Carlisle smiled at me, before giving Alice a warning look as he headed out the door and down the hall. I liked Carlisle, he was less grumpy than Charlie.

Alice settled down beside me, sitting cross legged on the baby blue hospital sheets. At least they were a pretty colour, unlike the ceiling. Despite not being able to remember much of the previous day, or exactly how I ended up with a concussion or 7 stitches in my head, I still had fleeting memories of Edward being in my bathroom while I had been semi conscious on the floor. I had decided these weren't a product of my imagination. Alice was my best friend, and our last conversation had proved that she had been keeping a lot from me. Best friends deserved the truth.

"So since you ruined your last decent top with blood, I was thinking that we could drive down to Olympia when you get out…"

"Stop Alice" Giving her what Alice often described as a 'death stare'. "I want answers Alice. I'm not as intelligent as you are, but I'm not stupid. And you know more than you're telling me" Alice stared at me for a long moment, before simply closing her eyes and rested her head in her hands. I waited. She had done this before; it usually meant she was thinking.

"Alice… The truth isn't hard. It's just a bunch of simple facts mashed together that you don't tell everyone. But you do tell your best friend." I waited. She didn't move. Propping myself on my elbows, I felt the dizziness invade once more but I ignored it.

"Alice…" Nothing. From this angle it did not even look like she was breathing.

"Alice I'm sorry but I just want to know…" Nothing.

After a long moment, she shuddered and lifted her head from her hands. Relief washed through me as I saw she wasn't upset. Instead worry played across her face, it surprised me. Nothing ever worried Alice. She was always so optimistic and sure of herself and her decisions. Jumping up from the bed she headed for the door.

"No Alice wait…" but she simply shook her head and shut the door. Her expression didn't change as she pulled a chair up next to my bed and curled herself into it.

"Bella…" Taking a deep breath, she stared into my eyes, like she was trying to read my soul. It was mesmerising, I couldn't drag my eyes away. "The truth isn't always easy. There is a lot about me and my family that you don't know. That nobody knows. I'll be honest and say that a lot of it you were never intended to know. But Edward has complicated that. I have never had a friend like you, apart from Jasper and my adopted brothers and sisters. But there is something very important you have to understand… some things you are better off not knowing and your knowledge of any of this cannot be repeated to anyone. Understood?" Her eyes pleading for the correct answer.

My mouth was dry, and unexpected tears welled in my eyes, so I simply nodded. I was confused. Alice's words didn't seem to connect with what I really wanted to know. Why had Edward been in my bathroom, and where he had disappeared to? Leaving me unconscious and in need of some serious medical attention.

"Edward turned up at your house shortly after you went to take a shower" She took a deep breath before continuing. Edward was there? He really was. A smile played across my face.

"He heard you hit your head, he heard you scream, so he went to make sure you were okay. Like a gentlemen" Strangely enough, I knew this wasn't going to end with a happily ever after. Alice looked like she wanted to curl herself into a ball and sleep.

"You didn't answer the door. So he knocked it down, worried for your safety. But there was blood everywhere, you were semi-conscious. Edward doesn't deal with blood very well, and he thought it would be in your best interest for him to leave. So he did. He shouldn't have Bella, and he regrets it. Its more complicated than you can imagine. Please don't hold it against him" She was pleading with me to FORGIVE him? I opened my mouth to speak, I wasn't entirely sure what to say but she shook her head and continued.

"Bella, my family and I, aren't like any other family in Forks. Not because we were all generously adopted by Carlisle. We are different. Just like everyone at school whispers." She took my hand, and for the first time I recognised how cold her skin was. In Forks, with the cosy combination of zero sunlight and constant rain, everybody's fingertips were cold. But even in this heated hospital room, she was cold.

"I know you have noticed things about me, and those members of my family that you have met, that are different from everyone else" Alice shook her head impatiently. Alice has never been afraid to speak her mind, and she never said the wrong thing. A trait that I wish I could box on sell. Yet now she seemed like she was forcing each word out with an immense amount of effort.

"Alice… Just say it" My heart thumped erratically in my chest, as Alice continued to keep her eyes locked on mine. Her eyes pleading, for me to drop it? My understanding? My forgiveness?

"I'm… We're not human, Bella" I froze. I couldn't breathe. I waited. The tears welling behind my eyes. Everyone was human. But although Alice had never told me everything, I knew she cared enough to never lie to me.

"We're…" She broke off, her tiny body shuddering "We're..V" The door flew open and smashed against the wall, as Edward flew into the room stopping inches from my bed. I dropped my eyes to my hands, a blush rising from my neck to colour my cheeks in a deep red. He placed one finger under my chin, gently coaxing my face up to meet his gaze. His fingertips, like Alice's were ice cold. Just like his lips had been. Unexpected anger raged through me. But I was frozen, waiting for someone to finish that sentence. And he did.

"Bella, I'm a vampire"


	6. Chapter 6 Left Me

**Edward**

I waited. For the screaming. For the terror. For the beautiful blush to disappear from her cheeks. But she didn't move. She just stared at me. I watched for her expression to change, a response to my horrifying words. Nothing.

Every part of me wanted to protect her. To wrap her in my arms and give her the universe. But who was I to offer that? A fire that I couldn't control raged every time I was near her, the potent scent of her warm blood invited me with every beat of her heart. Yet, when I stared into her eyes and what could only be described as something more, crashed over me. I had practised self control with Carlisle for 90years, and Alice, Emmett, Rosalie and even Jasper, had enough control to move within the human world without notice. When I stared into Bella's eyes, the thirst was still there. But the desperate need to be close to her was more dominant.

Wrenching my eyes from Bella's, I sent a furious look towards Alice. What had she done? I knew that she held an immense amount of trust in Bella, and she had seen that she would not reveal us to the human world we slipped into. But was Bella really ready to enter a world where she was breakable and defenceless? Or more importantly, that I was part of in such a destructive way?

"Bella, please tell me what you're thinking" I pleaded, staring deep within her eyes. Searching for any emotion that would reveal her response. Bella just blinked. I wasn't one to ramble, but I knew there was some pretty important things that Bella needed to know, and no time would ever be right.

"Bella, the first time I saw you, was the day you slept over our house when Carlisle and Esme went to Alaska and Charlie was away down in Seattle for the weekend and you didn't want to spend the weekend alone" Her eyes widened slightly at this but she didn't move.

"I came home in the middle of the night, from…" I didn't want to say it. Press it on her if she wasn't ready. Turning my head slightly I saw Alice nod. "…hunting. Alice hadn't told me about you. She thought of other things whenever she was around me. I hadn't known you were sleeping in the next room. Stupidly, I had been distracted enough not to hear your heartbeat. It was not till I made the second mistake of the night to open Alice's bedroom door that I saw you. Curled up on Alice and Jasper's bed, murmuring in your sleep. An image that I will carry with my everywhere" I took a deep unnecessary breath, giving Bella time to process my words. "And at that moment the only thing I wanted to was to lie beside you and do nothing but watch you sleep. I had never met you, or even heard your name before that night. But I felt something for you Bella. I still feel it, only stronger" A single tear rolled down her cheek. Instinctively, I rubbed my thumb over it still staring deep within her eyes.

"Keep going Edward. She needs to hear this" Alice whispered softly. I doubted Bella would have heard her words.

Unwillingly, I continued "Alice, rightfully told me to stay away. That you deserved better. I agree with her. But I still didn't listen. I wasn't enrolled at school. So there was no way I could see you there. Alice refused to bring you over again or let me see you. She wouldn't even speak to me" I dropped my voice to barely a whisper. Just loud enough for Bella to hear. "You didn't even know I existed, so I couldn't turn up at your doorstep" I swallowed, trying to give myself the strength to continue "One night, and well every night, I watched and listened outside your house, protecting you from a distance. Charlie was out and you were crying out for help. So…" I brushed my finger down her cheek watching as a glowing blush appeared below my fingertips "So I climbed in your window and sat on the edge of your mattress. I touched your cheek, and amazingly you stop yelling. You never woke up the entire time. You reached up and wrapped your fingers around my index finger exactly like newborn babies do. It was the most beautiful thing I have seen in my 100years of life."

"Then I followed you to the forest, and you know exactly what happened from then on. Bella, please tell me what you're thinking?" I was struggling to remain in control of my thirst and my emotions. I had told her everything, well everything that was important right now. Yet she had not uttered a single word. I dropped my gaze to the floor, concentrating extinguishing the fire that had been growing through my monologue. Alice was wrong. For the first time since I had known her, Alice was wrong. Everything wasn't going to be alright.

"You left me..." her voice was weak but still accusing breaking my reverence. My eyes snapped up to meet hers; tears were spilling over her cheeks like water running down a glass window. She pulled away from my hand. Her expression broke me in half.

"Yes Bella but only because I didn't want to…"But she cut me off before I could finish.

"You left me lying unconscious on the floor of my bathroom, with blood running down my face and a pretty serious head injury. AND YOU WALKED OUT" Each word was a stab. A sharp piercing knife penetrating my heart. "On me!"

"Bella, you need to keep your voice done. Otherwise the nurse will come in wondering what's going on" Alice broke back into my thoughts. She spoke hesitantly, like she was unsure of herself. It was almost like she was unable to see the outcome. Whatever she was thinking she was keeping from me. Keeping her mind busy with unrelated trivial memories and what she was giving everyone for Christmas. It bothered me but Bella was more important than Alice's mind games.

Bella simply shot Alice an exasperated look and turned back to ranting at me "I don't CARE whether you're a human" She swallowed and took a deep breath "or a vampire…YOU LEFT ME. Just like my own GODFATHER LEFT ME to drown in our sinking car. He had a chance to save as well as himself, but he never gave me a second thought because he was too much of a self possessed selfish man. I was lucky enough to get out myself of that car before I became fish food. What makes me so easy to walk away from?" She broke off with a sob that left me gripping to the edge of the bed to stop myself from wrapping my arms around her. I had asked myself that questions many times before except the word easy was never in it

"I'm so sorry Bella. Please forgive me. I didn't know" I searched her face and Alice's mind for the right thing to say but she was still staring at her cuticles. "I don't know the correct way to explain this to you Bella, but the temptation…" The anger that played across her face was incredible but I instantly knew my words had played differently in her head to mine.

"TEMPTATION?" She roared. Her hands clenched tightly in her lap.

"Get out Edward!"

**Bella**

I didn't understand. But I needed him to get out so I could think. He was so god damn beautiful. But the tear in my heart that Tom had left when he left me to drown wasn't healed. Not even close. It was only months ago. I had never told anyone about him or what happened except my parents. Edward had unintentionally sent those memories and emotions racing back before I was ready to deal with them.

And then there was the whole vampire thing. Which was _extraordina_rily weird but I had known something was different about Alice. I was going to shoot her down with 20questions later.

But then for the second time in a week where I was fully conscious he shocked me.

"No Bella" Blinking, I fought to comprehend those two words. "I made a mistake once. But I won't do it again to you" He shook his head patiently to reiterate his words.

"Edward" Alice and I spoke simultaneously. Embarrassingly enough I had forgotten about her presence less than a meter away from me. Smiling I let her continue.

"Charlie is around the corner so unless you plan on introducing yourself it might be a good idea to leave. You two can talk later" She sighed. She looked physically and mentally exhausted.

Then he did it again. Shock me that is.

"That's exactly what I'm planning to do"

And he did exactly that.

**Author Note: **

**So now that's finally out in the open I can move on. I don't think I have anything else to add here atm.**

**If anyone had ideas where you think its going or what Bella is going to do leave a review**

**HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE ******** Less than 2hours till Christmas here! I worked happily but hard for you guys!**

**A special thanks to:**

**d'ough, ****linsadair****, girlshapedhabit, ****dawntwilight000****, Char, ****KatieBellaTrix**** and cristiann romero for the reviews. Thanks for the inspiration**


	7. Chapter 7: My Story

**Bella**

And so for the second time in a fortnight, I found myself curled up on my front porch step trying to read but getting distracted. Charlie was worried about me, offering to stay home today and keep me company. He had replaced the door in the bathroom without comment, nor did he ask exactly why it was splintered beyond repair. Alice had answered many of questions about vampires, trying to unsuccessfully drag the topic of conversation back to her brother. She was beginning to become exceptionally frustrated at what she called my "extreme stubbornness" towards any topic that involved her brother or my Godfather.

For the first time since I had spent three and a half weeks in hospital after the accident, I forced myself to remember what happened. It was only during my outburst in the hospital that I had realised that I was still harbouring negative emotions toward him and what happened. I told everyone that I had chosen to forget what had happened and move on with my life. It was too bad that only part of that was true.

Wrapping my blanket tighter around my shoulders in an effort to shut out the particularly cold air for this time of year from touching my skin. I could see flashes of the icy water. The light from the car refracting through the murky water. Screaming. Bubbles. The last look he gave me before kicking towards the surface. Towards air. It was always in fragments, because I didn't think I was strong enough to live the whole thing again.

I felt his presence before I saw or heard him. Once again he was standing at the bottom of the stairs. I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to hear that he was sorry. I didn't want to admit that until I heard what he had done, I enjoyed his presence. I didn't want to admit that even now part of me wanted to be around him. I didn't want to look into his eyes. So I started to talk, without a real understanding of why.

**Edward**

I didn't know what I could say to her. I knew she didn't want to hear my apologies. So I waited. Until she took a deep breath and started talking, I was entranced by her words. I was seeing a side of Bella that she kept hidden from even herself.

"I had known Tom since I was a baby. It wasn't later till I found out that he had the hugest crush on my mum since high school which he made painstakingly obvious at every opportunity. She felt guilty because he could never seem to let go, even after she married Charlie. So she gave him the gift of making him my Godfather." She took a breath, rubbing the fabric of her blanket between her index finger and thumb. "He was like a second father to me, something that Charlie never approved of, then didn't have much of a say in when they divorced. He spoilt me, giving in to my every want. As I got older I realised that it wasn't necessarily me he was interested in, but he understood that to stay close to my mum he had to keep a tight hold on me. Subconsciously I knew I was being used, but happily reaping the benefits of it so I didn't mind."

Her story itself wasn't a heartbreaker, but I could hear the betrayal and pain laced through her voice. I craved her touch but knew it wasn't right. I didn't want to hurt her. Her pain, the emotions that played so clearly across her face and her body language as she stood in front of me tore through my body. I was helpless. So I let her continue.

"As I got even older, I found his presence overbearing. He constantly wanted to spend time with me. Picking me up from school without notice. Renting movies and insisting I watch them with him even if I had plans. My mum was single and lonely at that point in time so she enjoyed the company. Although she would never admit it she had a soft spot for him. Mum sucked at driving, she usually took the bus or got her friends to pick her up and it was time to get my Learners Permit. I needed a full licensed driver in the car." Her small fragile body was shaking, tears welled in her eyes. I didn't want to make her finish the story, but part of me knew that she was doing this for herself as well as me.

"It was my first time driving, and Tom wanted to give me a 'variety of experiences'. He started to pour raining, I don't think I have_ ever_ seen it rain that hard. I stalled the car at a set of traffic lights and I couldn't get it started again. Tom told me to get out and let him drive us home. It was raining that hard we could see less than a meter in front of the car. It happened so quickly, I can't even remember how we ended up going over the guard but all I can remember is watching the water through the windshield" Her breathing hitched and the tears rolled down her cheek. I resisted touching her. I wanted to protect her. "The car was filling up with water. My door was jammed and my seatbelt had locked itself around me. Tom managed to free himself and jimmy his door open. The car was almost full of water. I knew I only had seconds of breath left. I thought he would help me. But instead he just shot one longing look at me and swam towards the surface. I ran out of air just after I managed the wrench the seatbelt out of the seat and kick the door open. The last thing I clearly remember is the look he gave me before he left me there to die. I haven't spoken to him since. My mum tells me people act on impulse during accidents and that forgiveness is divine, but Charlie has always told me that people act truly under stress and in terrifying circumstances. I don't think she believed me that Tom left me trapped in that car. So I packed my bags and moved to the sunny state of Forks to live with my Dad" She broke off, rubbing the tears from her cheeks. I noticed that she wouldn't look at me, but I was just happy that she hadn't told me to leave. I know that I wasn't forgiven but it seemed like Bella was giving me a chance. Or maybe she was just showing me the mental repercussions of my actions.

"He broke you Bella." I started slowly… feeling for the right words to come to me. She still didn't lift her head from her lap despite my words for the first time today. Come on Bella - Look at me. The thirst at the back of my throat began to burn again, her blood literally singing to the monster within. If I didn't keep in control, I would lose my Bella. My Bella.

"I could apologize a thousand times but I know it won't change what I did. It won't change what Tom did to you. It won't make me feel any less guilty about what I did. So I won't apologize again. You already know I'm sorry Bella." I could feel the tension rising through me. The need to hold her. The need to keep her safe.

"I don't expect you to forgive me yet Bella. But I truly care about you. Nothing is more important than you are. Please let me be the glue to fix what he broke. Let me love you." Stretching my hand out, I reached the caress her cheek. Physical contact. The warmth beneath my fingertips felt incredible. Bella may have been a human and I may be a vampire. But at that point in time, it didn't matter. I was going to win her trust, her affection and put Bella back together. Show her that it's okay to let go and move on. Move on with me.

"You may be right Edward, but I'm not ready for that yet. I'm not ready for you just yet. So please let me find my own way for the moment." Her eyes locked on mine for the first time since I had presented myself in front of her. The colour was simply stunning, just like the rest of her. She stood up shakily, wrapping the blanket tighter around her shoulders.

"I'm not going to walk away from you again Bella" I slowly walked up the stairs until I was standing on the step below her. "But I'm not going to push you either. If you want me to leave I will." Slowly I leaned in to kiss her forehead, waiting for my fate. Maybe just slightly trying to push it my way.

**Bella**

No. Don't go. No stay here with me. No please. I shivered at the thought of his touch. The electricity from his touch was exhilarating.

"Please go Edward. Tell Alice I'll call her later" He touched my cheek again, the electricity flowing between us. I wasn't sure whether he could feel it. Or hear my heart literally trying to jump out of my chest. He smiled his gorgeous crooked smile that I had only seen on one other occasion. He turned and walked towards the street.

But I didn't want him to go.

________

I know the last chapter was a little out of the blue. It was something that was going to happen since the beginning in my head. Hopefully this chapter will finally get all the story telling and talking out of the way and get us into some physical stuff. I considered going back and editing it but I decided against it,

Please Please Please Review. Love or hate… aslong as the hate is put nicely. Your reviews make me write faster and better.

Shout out to cristiann romero, dawntwilight000, girlshapedhabit, linsadair, myluckystars2107 at and **4evrnd4alwys** and **ms_sarah_rose** at LJ. As well as everyone else who has reviewed. Thankyou so much!!

**Happy New Year Everyone!**


	8. Chapter 8 Express

**Sorry it has been a while since I have updated, but I realised I was giving you guys a half assed attempt at the story by not editing properly, not thinking out my drafts and publishing without thinking. So with some help by a friend, I bring you a newly vamped Chapter 8.**

**Two things. One is extremely important. YOU NEED TO WATCH THIS YOUTUBE VIDEO BEFORE READING THIS CHAPTER. If you don't, you won't get the full effect. Kay?**

http**:// **au **(dot) **youtube **(dot) **com**/**watch?v=WiSSOU_2q8Q. **Take out the brackets, and replace the dot with an actual . And remove the spaces. If you cant work it out youtube Rebecca Hart Because of You. This is the dance that Bella dances during this chapter. Yes this is OOC (which was my second note) but I needed a way to portray it and help Bella find a way out. It's a pretty personal thing with me too. Bella is still clumsy. Just not when she dances.**

**Third note, is that I may go back and edited previous chapters. I'll let you know if I do. I hope you have hung around despite the crap, and I appreciate it. Well here is it… Chapter 8 (watch youtube video if you haven't already)**

**-----------  
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**Bella**

Tearing upstairs, tripping on the third and fifth stair on the way to room, I ripped open the door and waited. Waited for the tears to roll over me. For the black cloud to drift over my head. For the pain to ripple across my chest. It had been an experience I had mechanically associated with everything that had to do with... him. But today, it didn't come.

Instead I found myself tearing through my drawers looking for something I hadn't worn in longer than I cared to remember. Laying my hands on the worn cotton I instantly relaxed. Pulling my worn beloved leotard out of the drawer, I buried my face within the cotton. It had been months since I had danced. After the accident for weeks I was physically incapable after that it was mental. Ever since I had been little dance had been my sanctuary, my expression of the rawest emotions that I had been harbouring. I was the clumsiest person alive when I wasn't dancing, two very different polar opposites. The amount of times I had ventured to the ER was incredible. My parents had forever teased me about it, I always put it down to the fact that I knew I was meant to dance. Stripping my sweats off, I tugged on an aged pair of porous black tights, before dragging the leotard over my body. My fingers slipped down my torso, brushing fingertips over the ladders and holes covering my legs. A symbol of hard work and love. Grabbing my keys and IPod of the kitchen table, I hurried out into the mist to the refuge of my Chevy. Jamming the keys into the ignition, my fingers were shaking uncontrollably. The engine coughed and spluttered, groaning in the cold air. Impatience washed over me as I twisted the keys harder in the ignition, forcing the truck to rumble and roar to life. Gunning the accelerator and twisting the steering wheel I pulled out onto the street and towards Forks High.

*

Standing in the middle of the room in the dark studio, I studied my body. Dragging my fingers though my hair, pulling it off my face and into a messy ponytail. I could feel the heat burning beneath my finger tips. The building tension in my muscles like a high strung race horse. Rubbing my hands down my face I could feel the moisture building behind my eyes. Ready to betray me. I could see myself floating through the dark icy water like an old movie. Blurry and faded. The expression that was etched on his face that I had convinced myself was going to haunt me forever. The screaming as I watched mere bubbles explode in front of my face. I saw the fear. The rejection. The awareness that was going to die. I saw the light fading behind my eyes. I saw the exact moment that I gave up. I gave up on those that I loved, the world… I gave up on myself. The images in my head flicked faster, flashing through the weeks of rehab, the flowers and gifts I had refused to accept and the disapproving looks shot inconspicuously from my mother. The half hearted hugs from my friends, who were convinced that I was suicidal. Nothing scared me more than death. I saw myself following Charlie into my old room that was about to become my only private space in the world. Alice's bubbly smile brightened the room before blurring into the darkness.

Suddenly my Ipod flickered, jerking me from my reverie, music drifted from my tiny speakers. So I did the only thing I knew how to without instruction, encouragement or inspiration. I danced.

My joints and muscles pulled away from my body, moving stiffly as a continuously turned across the room; dancing to the music rather than with it. My hips pulling the aesthetic line of my leg out of place. I struggled; fighting my body for the control I so desperately needed but was denied of. Following my body in the mirror, I watched the raw emotion play across my face. I was at my sanctuary.

"_I will not make the same mistakes that you did"_

I knew the clichéd saying all too well, my mum had loved to sprout it off at any time she felt fit. Fool me once, shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me. Instinctively I had wrapped myself in a cocoon, protective but suffocating.

Pushing my leg higher and sweeping my arms around I watched as my hair whipped behind me as the hair elastic fell softly to the floor behind me. Slowly I could feel my natural flexibility and cadence float back into my step, as I pushed each extension higher pouring everything I had into this improvised leap of faith.

"_I learned the hard way, to never let it get that far"_

With each step, I pushed my body further falling easily back into old technique. All the choreography that I had been so accustomed to, came flooding back, my mind reeling as my limbs fell easily into sync. As hard as I was trying, I couldn't give myself completely to each movement. I could feel something holding me back, a piece of string tied tightly around my waist tugging harder with each movement.

"_Because of you  
I never stray too far from the sidewalk"_

For months, I tried to understand. The counsellor my mum had gotten me told me that I was blocking my own path to recovery. "Immature Actions, Miss Swan" he had told me numerous times until I, point blank, stopped turning up. My Godfather was a replica of my own father, a comical version that didn't have the responsibility of discipline, but reaped the other benefits. I didn't understand why he had betrayed me. Why after years of spending a considerable amount of his life with me, that he could leave me to die. What had I done wrong?

"_So I don't get hurt"_

Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional giving that you have the strength to walk away. I didn't. I had wallowed deep within my pain, both physical and mental. I did not want sympathies so I suffered internally, hidden behind a dainty mask. As the weeks grew and turned into months I could feel it stretching, transparent under wear. That was when I decided to move to Forks. To separate myself from the world. Hidden deep within myself.

"_My heart can't possibly break  
When it wasn't even whole to start with"_

I danced harder, determined to lose myself. Closing my eyes, I poured the self hate, the angst, the rejection, the betrayal and the ultimate emotion of loneliness into each step. The string tugged harder but with little effect. Dropping towards the floor I stretched deep, lengthening my body to its furthest extent. I felt something snap. Splaying forwards, I rolled through my body to find myself on my feet again. I felt… free? Tears ran down my cheeks, drying up instantly from my body heat. Turning faster as I moved across the room, I watched myself in the dim light -- graceful and powerful. In control.

"_You never thought of anyone else  
you just saw your pain"_

Pain ripped across my chest, my muscles fatigued from previous months of inactivity ached in protest but I didn't stop. I wasn't ready for it to be over. I wasn't ready to come crashing back down to a world where nothing was as it seemed. I knew that pain should not be a normal part of daily life, but I didn't know if I had the strength to fight something that had become so normal. I knew I had to, for myself.

"_I tried my hardest just to forget everything"_

Something clicked as I brought my leg closer to my body, the momentum spinning me around till the colours of my world blurred. I would never forget what happened in the past. It was a part of me that for the past 6months corrupted and ruled my life. I never wanted to forget. I wanted to learn from it. To accept, and to live without the storm cloud that had invaded my life. To be free and in control.

I could feel the tension leaving my body, slowly dripping from my limbs. The weight that had laboured my body, disappeared with each stride. Slowly the hole where I had been ripped apart closed closer together, sewing itself methodically. For the first time in longer than I cared to remember, I felt at home. Somewhat at peace.

"_Because of you"_

"I gave myself the chance to start over. To be truly happy. To find love. To spend time with my Dad. To find myself" Whispering to the silent darkness. Previously, I would find myself in a room or street full of people, my friends, yet I would feel empty and alone. Now I was completely alone in a dark empty room, feeling alive. My body hummed with exhaustion and release. I was in my sanctuary.

Sliding down the mirror, the cool glass skimming across my bare skin, I smiled. Maybe. Just maybe with time I'm going to be okay.

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	9. Chapter 9: But I Can

**Edward**

"SHES NOT STUPID, MISTER I CAN READ MINDS" Alice roared over my piano. The growl that ripped from her throat sounding seemingly different from what often escaped from Emmett or Jasper. Protectively ferocious. My fingers slipped over the keys, creating a new song. It had been so long since I had written music, it was something that I loved to do ever since I began to learn to play but I needed inspiration. I had found inspiration. And her name was Bella.

"I know" The manic pixie I had as a sister was really starting to irritate me. She had chewed into me the minute I walked in the door saying demanding to know why I had left her in her bathroom. And was still going on about it 12minutes later. But I had learnt that you didn't win an argument with Alice if you rebutted her arguments. Staying quiet was your best option. Well your only option.

"Then why did you LEAVE HER? Are you plain stupid or where you having an "I went hunting and left my brain in a tree" moment? Honestly Edward. I thought she meant more to you than that? I had never seen you so happy after you went to see her. But hey if you don't feel anything for her…"

The chord I had been playing cut short as I flew towards Alice standing over her easily. She was tiny. A feral growl ripped from my throat as I started to speak. Much to my annoyance Alice only glared at me harder. Her thoughts were screaming "Try Me" at me louder than my own thoughts. Alice had no right to questions my feelings or actions towards or about Bella. I couldn't care less if she was her best friend. I heard Jasper slip into the room, drifting protectively towards Alice but wondering if it was really worth interrupting at this point. He could feel that she wasn't feeling threatened or in any immediate danger. Too bad she couldn't see split second decisions.

"You have no idea what you're talking about. You do not know me." My voice was deep and low, a growl rumbling deep within my chest. "You do not know Bella. You cannot make decisions for either of us. No matter how good of a physic you, you cannot feel emotions between us." If it was possible I took a step closer to Alice, laying an iron grip on her shoulder.

"Just because you can't read her mind"

Jasper decided now was a pretty good time to intercede and water us down.

"But I can" Jasper interrupted the stare match, pushing calming vibes over both of us. I tried to resist, but I knew it was pointless; especially with Alice involved. He slipped an arm around Alice's tiny waist and pulled her out of my grip, letting her mould naturally to his side.

"But Jasper you haven't…. OH!" Her eyes widened in shock before zeroing in on Jasper's innocent expression. "You felt Bella" It wasn't a question; it was a statement.

"Yeah sweetheart I did. I went to pick you up one day from the hospital since you didn't have a car. You were trying to speak with Bella about Edward; a lot of what she said was a lie. The emotions radiating out of her and THROUGH the wall were intense, I had to leave. I thought you would have seen me." He watched her expression, trying to determine whether he was going to be sleeping on the couch for the next week.

I felt like an outsider watching these two make love. The intensity making me shiver as I realised that someday I wanted that. Someday I wanted that with Bella.

Alice reached up on her toes and kissed him softly before wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I'm nothing but proud that you walked in and out of a hospital by yourself without losing control. I knew you could do it Jaz, you just needed a little confidence in yourself" Her voice was high and soft. I looked away from the two of them and Alice's little endearing speech. God I hoped they weren't turning into Rose and Em.

Jasper turned to me, opening his mouth to speak. Even though I could read his mind, I could pull myself together quickly enough before he started to speak.

"Edward, despite what Bella has told you and Alice, she is in love with you. But you have to prove you're worth it. She isn't certain of herself, and she is harbouring a lot of resentment towards someone, it's not you or Alice however. Use that rusty old charm of yours" Smiling genuinely at me, he pulled Alice up the staircase his mind wandering to more erotic thoughts as they neared their bedroom door.

"Jeez Jaz, she is my sister. Keep it in your pants" Alice giggled before I heard the door shut softly behind them.

**Bella**

The smile that had crept across Charlie's face when I came home in my old leo and tights was ecstatic. He evened offered to do the dishes. Glancing in the mirror before I trudged up the stairs, I could not only feel but also see the difference in myself. My cheeks blushed with colour, and my skin was illuminated for the first time in months. Shrugging it off as just some nasty smelling sweat and grunge I stepped into the shower to clean myself up.

Lying in bed, I could feel my muscles and joints tightening from my 'work out'. I should have stretched before getting into my toasty truck, but hindsight is wonderful and useless.

In reality, all I had done was dance around an empty room to a random track but truthfully I felt different. Free. Released. Somewhat whole. The string tied tightly around my waist, that had restricted my life had snapped and fallen away. Leaving me feeling slightly vulnerable against my new found freedom but I liked it.

My thoughts drifted… no headed one hundred miles per hour towards one particular boy. Edward. Despite myself, I couldn't seem to stop thinking about him, seeing his face in my mind not to mention replaying his words in my head; on constant repeat. My mind flashed to the kiss, I jumped at the heat that rushed up from my toes to spread to my fingertips. Closing my eyes, I smiled as a I remembered his visit the next day and the words that shocked me even now…

"_YOU don't understand. YOU have no idea. I want NOTHING more right now than to rip your clothes off, push you against that wall and have EVERY part of you. Right now."_

He had placed so much emphasis on the word you. Even though his words seemed so… crazy, I couldn't doubt him for a moment. Smiling wryly, as understanding and excitement washed over me.

Fate just couldn't be changed. Not even for a vampire.

**----**

**It's coming. A little Bella & Edward love. The next update will be soon, because the next chapter will be fairly easy to write. Thank you to those have reviewed, and much love to my regulars. Every review makes me smile, and I have hopefully replied to all the signed ones.**

**I'm aiming for let's say ****10 reviews**** for this chapter. Help me get there! Leave your thoughts!**


	10. Chapter 10: Meeting The Family

**Sorry its taken me so long. So here it is: Meeting the Family!**

**Edward**

"The forest" Alice's soft voice called from her room

**Bella**

The dreams were… quite bearable actually. Possibly even enjoyable. Despite them being completely fictional and that I had not spoken nor seen Edward Cullen since I had told him I wasn't ready. At that time I wasn't ready for anything, and change topped that very long list. The gorgeous freaking angel had probably gone and moved on to some perfectly normal teenage girl that was willing to put out. Since when was I ever good enough? Nothing had changed since I had moved in with Charlie.

Charlie had gone fishing with Billy and Alice was out of town with Jasper; who I still hadn't met. All I saw ahead of me was a very lonely empty day. Slipping my arms into my jacket, I bustled down the front stairs and wandered aimlessly till I found myself standing alone, drenched and seemingly content in the evergreen forest that surrounded my house. I hated the rain, the snow, the wind and the cold but the forest brought an unexplained amount of comfort. I hadn't ventured into the forest since my first encounter with Edward. It seemed so long ago, part of me missed the rather consistant green environment. Pulling my hoodie further over my head, I turned to head back home to find my face inches from Edward Cullen.

**Edward**

She was even more beautiful in the rain. Fuck, she smelled even better in the rain. Maybe that was because she was about 7cm from my body. The usual warmth that radiated off her body wasn't there.

Bella had turned into a living statue, each breath short but deep. I wanted to know what she was thinking. I _needed _to know what she was thinking. The deep chocolate brown eyes flickered to my chest. Alice's thoughts had told me I only had minutes to make it to the opposite side of town, thoughtlessly I had forgotten a shirt; my mind had been preoccupied. Her gaze shifted towards my face as she watched me intently. I wasn't sure whether it was a good thing or not. Slowly, a smile stretched across her face. A very good sign.

She did not drop her gaze. Her brown eyes deep with curiosity. Her lips opened only millimetres as she blew a sweet scent lightly across my face. Venom began to pool under my tongue as her heartbeat began to race.

"Bella…" Not very original but I had to say something. Something to distract me from the warm blood pooling beneath her cheeks. The curiosity that burned behind her eyes drew me closer; I wanted to hear her thoughts. I wanted to know how she felt about me.

"Yes?" Her confidence was shaky; I feel her body shaking only centimetres' away from mine. I wanted to touch her, despite the known danger it posed for her. I wanted to hold her warm body against mine, let it mould to the contours of my torso. I wanted to run my lips along her jawbone.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. I really had nothing to say I just want to hear her name and hold her attention just a little bit longer. Without thinking, I bent down and brushed my lips softly against hers. Her lips were so soft, my heaven on earth. She was startled by my unexpected touch but there was no doubt in the way her lips moulded instantly to mine. I should stay away from Bella, and putting my lips anywhere near hers was probably the stupidest thing I had done in a while; maybe I really had left my brain in a tree. But I didn't want to, and there was no way in hell I was going to argue. I reached out and touched her cheek with the slightest of pressure. Running it down her cheek, I noticed her body temperature was extremely low.

"You're freezing Bella." My own body temperature wasn't helping the situation but I didn't want to move away. So instead I did the exact opposite, I wrapped my arms protectively around her shivering body. Damn why I hadn't I brought a jacket.

"I know" Her teeth chattering together. She was really adorable; possibly too adorable for her own good. Picking her up, I could feel the electricity flow between us, looking down at her face I wondered whether she could feel it. I started walking towards the edge of the forest, but I grew frustrated with the speed.

"Edward? Uh where are--, " She stopped talking as a sped at an inhuman speed towards my house. She pressed her face into my stone chest as the icy wind blew through us. Reaching my driveway in a matter of minutes, I bent down and pressed my lips to her cheek.

"Bella, would you like to come meet my family? And get some dry clothes?" I whispered in her ear as she turned her face towards mine. A grin slipped across her face, and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Yeah I would like that but only if you answer some of my questions" Gently I slipped my arm from underneath her knees so she could set her feet on the ground. Bella stumbled forward before I caught her in my arms.

"What am I going to do with you?"

**Bella**

Edward has spent the good part of the last 40minutes answering every single question about vampires, his family, and most importantly, about him. I had spent the last 40minutes snuggled up against his cool body completely content with life. It was strange that although I had known this guy for no longer than a month with only a few conversations under the belt, I felt like we had known each other for years. And the vampire thing? That only freaked me out a little. After making me take a hot shower, he had given me one of his button down shirts to wear. The shirt hit my thighs just above my knees and smelled incredible. I wonder whether he'd let me keep it? I could always steal it.

He seemed perfectly fine with all my questions, even when I pushed further into the supernatural world he lived within; until I asked how he felt towards me.

"What about me?" I asked timidly.

I could feel his body tense around me; his fists clenched at the blanket I was wrapped in before he buried his face in my hair.

"Everyone is home" He breathed into my hair before pulling us upright. It did not worry me so much that I was about to met… oh 6 vampires. I just wanted them to like me, and I wasn't entirely sure they would. What was I supposed to do if they didn't? I couldn't exactly bring chocolates. Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the door. As we reached the top of the staircase, he pulled me tight against his body and nuzzled his nose against my neck. With every touch I could feel the electricity run between us. Even though he had told me he couldn't read my mind, it was like with every touch he knew exactly what felt amazing and when I wanted more.

"Bella, they are all really excited to meet you. They have all just been hunting so there is… no danger. I won't let anything happen to you" I heard a roar of laughter from downstairs and a thump. Well at least they were in a good mood.

"Um Edward?" I stopped in the hallway. He turned back to look at me, puzzled by my abrupt stop.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not wearing any pants" Fingering the cotton of his shirt suggestively. Definitely keeping this shirt. I was not however about to meet his family in little more than an oversized shirt.

His eyes wandered lazily down my body. I could feel the exact place of his gaze all the way down to my bare thigh. Edward dropped my hand, reappearing seconds later with a pair of jeans. From the size, they weren't his and looked too small to be Alice's. Shrugging, I pulled them on with Edward cheekily fastening the button.

Edward tugged me down the stairs to where 6 gorgeous vampires stood smiling at the bottom. Alice bounded over to me, kissing my cheeks before whispering "About time," in my ear. She danced back to stand by a blonde haired boy who looked like he wanted to me some place else. I guessed that was the mystery boyfriend who Alice never stopped talking about.

Edward squeezed my hand before introducing me to the rest of his family.

"Bella, this is my mom and dad for all illustrative and disciplinary purposes, Carlisle and Esme" Smiling in what I hoped was a warm way; I whispered my thoughts on their gorgeous house. I had met Carlisle briefly at one of my short stints in the hospital, he had been happy to let me go home with some painkillers and a promise to look after myself. Now I was just embarrassing myself beyond belief.

"Alice and Jasper," Gesturing towards my best friend and her boyfriend. Alice giggled before shooting Edward an idiotic look. God I loved her.

"Edward… I don't need to be introduced to my own best friend. But yes Bella, this is Jasper who you might have heard just a little bit about." Jasper smiled and I felt a rush of ease flow over me. I vaguely remembered Edward saying something about Jasper having some ability but I made a mental note to ask him later.

"Ah finally I get to meet the mysterious boyfriend that Alice never shuts up about" Jasper smirked before looking down at Alice. Everyone else laughed at my unintentional shot at being funny. Laughter was a good sign. As long as they weren't laughing at me. Edward's arm crept around my waist as he moved onto the last couple standing in the room.

"Bella… This is Rosalie and my brother Emmett. As a rule, don't pay attention to a thing Emmett says and he responds well to dog commands. Rose has him trained well considering what she had to work with" Laughter again erupted in the living room, as Emmett grinned before walking towards us. Rosalie grinned before placing her hands on her hips; watching Emmett advance towards us.

"Hey Bella. As a rule, Edward is an old-fashioned prude who hasn't been laid in who knows how long and doesn't listen to a thing anyone tells him. Oh and welcome to the family Bella. I've always wanted a lil sis who wasn't as annoying as Alice." Laughter bubbled out of my lips as Emmett wrapped his huge arms around my body, squeezing me tight.

"Emmett uh AIR" I squeaked.

"Ah I love playing with humans" He lowered me to the floor and ruffled my hair before moving back to Rosalie. From the look on Edward's face, he didn't seem to appreciate Emmett's since of humour. Although he grip was as tight as hell, he seemed to openly accept me which was definitely a good start. I knew that acceptance from Edward's family was essential if I wanted to spend more time with him… but what exactly did everyone else think?

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**So what do you think? I have written this chapter about 10 times till I found something that I liked. No its not perfect but its the closest I was going to get. I go back to school next week but I do promise to update more often! Brownies for everyone who reviews! **

**Becca**


	11. Update: No Chapter

This is not a new chapter. I realise that its been AGES since I have posted. I started the final two years of my highschool life at the end of January as well as a new school and its taken a while to get used to. I have exams and assessments for the next two weeks, however I promise that I will have a new chapter for you all around the 23rd of March.

My last few chapters have been sub par, and I now have a beta so I will bring Unforgiving Love back with a totally refreshing feel.

I realise I have probably lost alot of readers. I haven't forgotten about UL, it just went on a brief hiatus and is on its way back


	12. Chapter 11

___OK I'm sorry. Really Really REALLY SORRY that is has taken me THIS long to update. Life suddenly got a lot harder and I didn't have the energy, time or the ideas to write this chapter. It actually turned out alot differently than I planned, Edward was being really good today and decided not to be as moody as in previous chapters ____ I don't have a beta so if there are any spelling or grammatical errors (keeping in mind I'm an aussie) I apologize in advanced. If anyone would like to be a beta for this story leave a review ___

_This chapter is more about Bella and Edward rather than Edward being a vampire while Bell's in a human. I wanted to get down some Bella and Edward interaction, Cullen love and maybe a little bit of fluff. All in the name of Twilight._

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**_Bella_**

Who knew that coven, or more accurately put, _family _of vampires could be so welcoming and hilariously. Although I'm pretty sure Emmett had that one down all on his own. And well then there was Rosalie. She had tugged Emmett out the to the garage without so much as a hello, with Emmett appearing moments later looking begrudged and awkward. His grin returned moments later as he spied Edward's arm wrapped tightly around my waist.

"Naw come on Eddie boy, we aren't going to eat your hunny bun... I don't want to deal with Mr Grumpy Pants for the next century and a half". This playful remark set everyone off, officially breaking the icy setting Rosalie had left everyone in.

Sitting on Edward's lap, I watched with amusement the rather nonexistent game of chess being played before me. Alice was staring absently to something over my shoulder while Edward was studying Alice intently.

Jasper was perched rigidly on the couch behind Alice, his eyes wary and body tense. From the little Edward had shared of Jasper's past, I understood that he did not trust me and I made him feel extremely uncomfortable. Great relationship going there.

Esme came to sit by my side, taking my hand lightly and squeezing it. Idly, I wondered whether Esme would get along with Renee, before remembering that Renee has chosen her '_other_' family. Immediately I regretted thinking of her, it only brought unwanted pain.

"I'm so glad to meet you Bella. We have heard so much about you from Alice and then from Edward. It takes a special person to find acceptance so easily." Her voice was soft but her gentle smile genuine. Carlisle has always spoken about his lovely wife whenever I landed myself in his emergency room, but she was rarely seen around town.

"It's been great to meet everyone and put the faces to the names." I breathed out slowly as Edward's hand skimmed absently beneath my shirt. His fingers leaving a fiery trail across my bare skin.

"Edward's hand flicked his queen across the board diagonally, calling checkmate. Alice's face puckered as she realised her mistake. She shot an evil look at Edward's cocky smirk before pulling me out off his lap.

"Bella, I have to apologize. As you've come to realise I haven't exactly been honest with you these past couple of months. It wasn't that I didn't like you or trust you, but I wasn't able to tell you the truth. You've the best human friend I've had ever but it was difficult circumstance, harder still once Edward was involved but it came to a point where you couldn't be left in the dark. I apologize again Bella but that's the way it had to be." Her eyes were filled with the obvious regret and pain but even I could see the "Alice twinkle" remained. Edward's body pressed harder against mine.

"She's only playing you Bella; she knows you're going to forgive her and that you don't hold it against her." His voice lingered in my ear. I could feel the electricity running so powerfully between us. I craved for his touch more than anything, but I had told him I wasn't ready. Those words were not a lie when I had spoken, however that was no longer true. The gentleman that Edward was meant that he would not push me and would wait patiently for my lead. Sometimes, I wished the gentleman within would go take a hike.

"Jeez Edward... such a kill joy. Bella was my friend first" Her smile devious and her eyes dark.

I could only smile at the obvious mind war going between them as Alice appeared to my arguing with her mind rather than her mind, growing more frustrated as Edward's grin grew. Jasper had appeared behind Alice, my eyes flickered to meet his. Jasper had failed to make eye contact the entire time I had been here, becoming one of the two worries I had. Offering up a smile I hoped that we could get on better grounds, considering he was Alice's boyfriend, fiancé, husband?.

"He does like you Bella" Edward's voice breathed in my ear, "Jasper is the newest addition, without counting you, to the Cullen family and our... _dietary choices_ take some getting used to"

Surprising me once again, he offered up a small smile as happiness and ease washed over me. Some things I would never understand.

**_Edward_**

I could not think of a time where I wanted her more. Not her blood but actually Bella. I craved her presence, her touch, not to mention _her thoughts. _Considering in the last month she had gone from being a sweet innocence _beautiful_ human knowing nothing of the... supernatural world to knowing everything, meeting seven of them and spending a large amount of time in the presence of them. I could not begin to imagine her thoughts.

Slipping my arm from her waist to grab her hand, I tugged her towards the stairs, not however before noticing her frown when I removed my arm or Alice's glare from across the room. With every step I wanted her more, the polite distance for Bella's and my family sake I had put between us for the last half an hour was bordering painful. I _knew_ I was being completely ridiculous and selfish, but stupidity was not going to be added to that list by letting her go.

Towing Bella through my bedroom door I shut and locked the door in the same instance that I pulled Bella's warm body against mine feeling it mould instantly. I had spent the last 27 and a half minutes wanting nothing more than her body against mine, I loved my family but sometimes they were a little too excited.

Burying my face in her hair, I could smell our scents entwined due to the combination of my shirt and her... well just being Bella. I could also smell Esme, something I could do without for that moment. Without a second thought I lifted Bella off the ground with one hand and whipped the jeans off in another, sliding them off to reveal her bare skin.

"EDWARD!"

"Yeah?" Regret washed through me as I looked deep into her eyes waiting for an answer, the shock and confusion was blatantly obvious.

"Uhh the jeans?" Embarrassment burned across her cheeks, sending an incredible blush to rise up her neck and colouring her cheeks beautifully

"I like them better off" Shrugging absently. I'd only given them to her for comfort sake when I introduced her to my parents; I liked her better in just my shirt, and only my shirt. I wouldn't mind if she chose to only wear my shirts ever again. Suited me fine.

"Maybe you should ask next time you like my clothes better" Anger flickered in her eyes and she turned away from me, walking towards the window. At least it wasn't the door.

For a few minutes I just watched her stare absently out the window into the forest surrounding our house playing absently with a loose thread from the hem. With the events of today and how close we had grown in a matter of hours I had seemingly forgotten my manners. Walking slowly up behind her, closing the friction between us I gently wrapped my arms around her waist waiting for her body to react. It took only seconds for her tense posture to relax against me.

"I am so sorry Bella, I was not thinking. I should not have been so rude. Please forgive me. Would you like me to take you home to get some clothing?" My voice reverting back to a formal tone. I waited in silence for Bella's response, hoping that I had not offended her.

Slowly she twisted around in my arms to look into my eyes, but remained silent. Lowering my head I kissed her forehead, skimming my lips down her nose to place another kiss on the very tip of her nose. With her smile brought warmth to our bodies, creating friction in itself. Highly enjoyable. Lightly pressing my lips against hers, I could feel her entire body warming beneath my touch. As her fingertips explored around my spine, I shuddered but deepening the kiss in response. Running my tongue along her bottom, I could taste her sweetness. I could love nothing more

Breaking away from me, Bella finally opened her mouth to talk, "It's fine but only if I can make my own fashion adjustments", grinning slyly.

Confused, I watched as she tugged my sweater up over my chest, and then it clicked what she meant. I was wondering exactly what she had been planning to take off considering she didn't have all that much left on.

Running her fingers down my chest as I walked her backwards against my bedroom wall, pressing her against it gently with my own body until there was no space left between us. She froze beneath me, and I instantly regretted the move. I didn't want to push her when she had explained quiet clearly that she wasn't ready. I immediately took a step away from her, extracting myself from Bella's tensed arms.

Watching her expression, surprisingly I saw confusion rather than pain or anger. She took a gingered step towards me, but I made no advancement. Bella simply stared at me like I had two heads and had suddenly turned green.

"What's wrong Bella?" softly breaking the silence. She simply shook her head before reaching up on her toes to kiss me. Slowly I kissed her back, trying to decipher her silences and confusing advances. It was incredibly frustrating not be able to read her thoughts, something that could come in handy at this point in time. I took another step back, trying to clear my thoughts. Her whole body slumped at my withdrawal. Her face scrunched up as she rubbed her face, almost as if she was about to...

"Bella... hey don't cry... I'm sorry I really didn't mean it like that.. I just..." Reaching out to pull her towards me again. How could I explain without her feeling like I was pressuring her?

"Don't you want me?" Her words rang clear in my ears, how could she honestly think that? I thought I had explained my thoughts every clearly. Bella meant everything in the world to me; I would protect her even if it meant losing my own life. Bella was my world, and I wanted nothing _but _her.

"Love, look at me" taking her face between my hands "you mean _everything _to me and **of course** I want you, but I know you want space to work some things out and I respect that. I don't want to push you until you ready. Take as long as you feel necessary and I'll be here" I searched her eyes for a reaction, hoping to see my words had sunk in.

"Edward I'm ready now. I worked all my... stuff... out and I..."She broke off looking down to the carpet " want you now...". A blush reddened her cheeks, causing my throat to burn.

Burn. Blood. Fragile little Human. Bella. Vampire. Edward.

A normal... well normal for Bella... uncontrollable reaction had sent my whole mood crashing down. I could feel my entire mood tensing and my eyes dark. Bella had mistaken my sudden reaction as a rejection to her words, closing her eyes she turned to the door and attempted to run out of it.

"Bella Bella Bella" Grabbing her wrists before burying my face in her soft natural curls from the rain.

"Let me go Edward." Pulling my face from her face I stared deep within her chocolate eyes, red rimmed and watery but still incredibly gorgeous. The venom pooled under my tongue and the flames ripped through my throat but I ignored the monsters chants. If Bella and I had a hope in hell, and I was going to give everything so we could, I was going to have to be a man, be in control and suffer the raging monster that thirsted for her blood. She was more important.

Refusing to argue with her, I simply crushed my lips against hers running my cool tongue along her swollen bottom lip, happy to feel her body relaxing instantly beneath mine. My words were not going to convince Bella of my... love for her, but my actions might get me at least in the door. Pouring everything I knew, everything I felt and everything I could possibly _give_ into the deepest and most amazing kiss I had shared with Bella, I hoped it was enough. I hoped I was enough.

**_Bella_**

God he could kiss. He had mood swings like a yo yo, was confusing as hell, sported sex hair ALL THE TIME but he was god and could kiss like one.

Softly there was a knock at the door, and a second later Alice's head appeared. Edward refused to be interrupted, dropping the kiss from my lips to behind my ear, sending bone shattering shivers down my spine. Edward's hands moved from my hair to my hips in support, something I welcome. If he continued to suck and kiss like that I was entirely sure how long I was going to remain vertical.

"No Alice I'm not" He lips vibrated against my neck, making me shudder in response.

"Bella, do you want me to leave with Alice and Jasper to go hunting?" He words confused me but there wasn't much that would make me willingly ask him to remove his lips from my body.

"No but if you..." If he need to leave to hunt I wouldn't stop him, I understood the boundaries. But jeez he knew how to work those lips. I could feel my entire body growing extremely sensitive and highly strung. But Edward cut me off before I got the chance to finish.

"See. Not going Alice. See you later" Edward's lips moved back to my lips, softly sucking on my bottom lip. Deepening the kiss I ran my lip across his glassy lip, breathing in his sweet scent. As much as I would understand if he had to leave, if he didn't want to go; I wasn't about to pressure him into leaving.

Running out of air, I grudgingly broke away from Edward's kiss only to bury my face against his chest. Some people still need to breathe. Unfortunately. His heart was silent but his breathing was short and shallow. He sighed before pressing his face into my hair.

"I love you Bella"

It wasnt a question. It wasnt really even a statement, rather a declaration. I didnt have to think about it, the words came into my head the moment I heard those four fairly simple but powerful words.

_"I love you too_"

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So... WHAT DID YOU THINK? Liked it? Hated it? Loved it? Pretty pretty pretty PRETTY please leave a review so I know that I'm still on the right track. lol I never imagined the ILY's coming into this chapter but B&E have a mind of their own


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